What is a Corporate Life?

1.  I learnt to operate 3 critical machines
*         Scanner
*         Printer
*         Xerox Machine

2.  I learnt to use 3 High End Software:
*         Microsoft Word
*         Microsoft Excel
*         Microsoft PowerPoint

3.  I learnt to use 3 great short cuts:-
*         Ctrl+C
*         Ctrl+V
*         Ctrl+S

4. I learnt to say three very important words for professional life:-
*         Yes sir
*         Ok sir.
*         I'll Just Do That sir

5.  When I really wanted to quit, I learnt to: -
*         Wake Up early
*         Sleep late
*         Continue to Work

6.  I learnt to: -
*         Face Monday
*         Fight For next 5 Days
*         Wait For Sunday

7.  I learnt to give reasons to family, friends and relatives for not making
*         Phone Calls
*         Messages
*         Mails

8.  I learnt to celebrate these things far away from loved ones:-
*         Birthday
*         New Year
*         Festivals

9.  At the end, People say:-
*         You Learnt...
*         You Earned...
*         You Enjoyed...

10.  But when I compare me with my self...
*         I just Sustained...
*         I just Tolerated...
*         I just Survived... for bucks

11.  I have survived:-
*         For convenience of my Family...
*         To avoid blame of Society...
*         To get tag of Employment...

Dedicated to all employees 😊

A highly successful Manager was going home in his car when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass.

Disturbed by the sight, he ordered his driver to stop and got out to investigate.

He asked one man
"Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."

"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you" the manager said.

"But sir, I have a wife and five children with me. They are over there, under that tree".

"Bring them along," the manager replied.

Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us also."

The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and seven children with me!"

"Bring them all, as well," the manager answered.

They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as it was.

One of the poor fellows turned to the Manager and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The manager replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the grass is almost 1 meter high!"

Lesson : Never trust Managers ... They will go to any extreme to finish their job.

And there is none like a KIND MANAGER 😜

WARNING ⚠ ⚠ ‼‼‼‼‼‼

Please, don't eat anything at these places
1.McDonalds
2. Burger King
3. KFC
4. Domino's
5. Pizza Hut
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              without me😂

Narendra modi & Obama were talking in a bar.

A guy came in n asked them wats d discussion about???
Modi: v r planning to kill 14 crore pakistanis & sunny leone!!

Guy: why Sunny Leone??

Suddenly Modi tells Obama: See I told u nobody would care about 14 crore pakistanis!!!!!!

Wife: I’m heading to the store. Do you want anything?

Hubby:  I want a sense of meaning & purpose in my life. I seek fulfillment and completeness to my soul. I want to connect to God and discover the spiritual side to me....

Wife: Be specific -
Black Label or Chivas?

A small ATM room which is equipped with 2 ACs and 4 tubelights, is asking me not to print receipt
.
.
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To save environment.

Interviewer - so what's your email ID?

Me - sir, abc@xyz.com

Interviewer - and password?

Me - 12345678

Interviewer - you shared such a confidential information so easily for the job. How can we trust that you will not share any confidential information of the company for some better offers?

Me - Sir, I might have shared my password with you but I don't think you can still login to my email account. Let's look for the possibilities. My password can be

12345678

Or

Onetwothreefourfivesixseveneight

Or

1twothreefourfivesixseveneight

1twothreefourfivesixseven8….. so on

Or

2444666668888888 (one 2, three 4….)

13355557777778 (1, two 3, four 5……, 8)….. so on

Or

Combination of all of these…

By the way, did I mention use of capitals?

Interviewer 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
How much slry will u take my boss?

He beats him again

What do you call a financial controller who always works through lunch, takes two days holiday every two years, is in the office every weekend, and leaves every night after 10 p.m.?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.Lazy.